


losing game

by ynmnsoulmates



Series: thai bl actors [1]
Category: Thai Actor RPF, จูบให้ได้ถ้านายแน่จริง เร็วๆนี้ | Kiss Me Again: The Series (TV) RPF, รักไม่ระบุสถานะ | Dark Blue Kiss (TV) RPF
Genre: Angst, M/M, One Shot, One-Sided Attraction, i love you tay, i wrote this in one go, im sorry for hurting u in this heuheu, no beta we die like non, this is my first thai actor ff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-29
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:00:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 795
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26716417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ynmnsoulmates/pseuds/ynmnsoulmates
Summary: Loving New was a losing game.
Relationships: New Thitipoom Techaapaikhun/Tay Tawan Vihokratana
Series: thai bl actors [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1944295
Comments: 3
Kudos: 13





	losing game

**Author's Note:**

> hi! this is my first ff of thai actors (bl)! i have recently been obsessed with them! enjoy!!
> 
> if you do have any recommendations for thai bl series, pls do comment! i would love to watch more!

When Tay first met New, he didn't know that he would eventually fall in love with the latter. He had always thought that he viewed the male as his younger brother, a best friend.

But he shouldn't feel shy around a younger brother, right? He shouldn't long for his embraces, shouldn't feel want for the man.

He couldn't exactly pinpoint to what he's actually attracted to. Was it New's personality? The way he smiled with all the love in his eyes?

Was it how New had never taken advantage of his kindness? The way the latter would care for him in his own unique way? Was it the warmth that Tay felt whenever the younger would slightly touch him?

Maybe he didn't had a reason behind his love towards the male. But he could never forget the moment when he knew, when he  knew that something _was_ different.

He still remembered how he felt. The way his heart kept beating quicker when he watched the way New smiled while looking at their surroundings, the way his eyes sparkled when he looked back at Tay to speak.

They were at Phuket, and it was Valentines' Day.

He couldn't hear nor feel anything as he looked at New in his natural environment; free and loving as he welcomed the cool breeze around his body. He couldn't respond when New tilted his head innocently to the side, awaiting for an answer to his question.

Tay's senses zeroed in on the touch on his shoulder as New shook him confusedly. The older male blinked his eyes rapidly, and the latter could only chuckle before going back to observing their surroundings.

Tay lets out a rush of air as he snaps out of his trance, breathing sharply when he caught New smiling widely at him. Oh no.

He promptly excuses himself and rushes to the washroom without waiting for a response, and he locks the door behind him with shaky hands. He reaches for his left chest to squeeze at where his heart would be, and shakes his head frantically.

"No, no... No!" He starts panicking as he tries to recompose himself, to stop his heart from wanting to jump out of his chest.

Despite the extreme effort he went through afterwards to stop gaining more feelings for the younger, there was no way he could avoid falling harder when New was such an amazing person. Loving New felt wonderful.

And happiness always comes to an end.

He remembered vividly; the moment when New told him that he had found a perfect partner to love - a girlfriend.

How the amount of happiness on New's face didn't mirror his, and how he desperately tried to shove his emotions down his throat as he fakes a genuine smile to show that he's happy for him.

"R-really?"

New didn't seem to mind the shakiness in his voice, and nods happily, "She's perfect! She was actually waiting for me to ask her out all this time."

Tay leans back into the chair, nodding along as an ache he's not used to starts growing at his heart. He holds his smile and looks at his best friend with eyes slightly teary, "Tell me more about this lucky girl."

And as New embarks into a speech about how the girl seemed right for him with the same smile he smiled for him, Tay starts drowning in a world of pain.

Tay knew he wasn't supposed to fall for a hetero man; someone who was also his best friend. But the heart wants what it wants, right?

Of course, fans had to found out about her. It caused a rage among the shippers, and they started attacking her on social media platforms. And it hurt Tay to see New in pain from the backlash.

So he distanced himself from his best friend, to help with the situation. He wanted to respect their relationship; he doesn't want to get in the way. Maybe the shippers would understand his situation too, and they would eventually stop the hate.

It hurt Tay to act like he was fine without New by his side. They had always sticked to each other like leeches, and now they were acting like strangers. 

But this is for their own good. It's time for Tay to stop feeling this way, and time for New to be happy with someone he  _ loves _ .

They stopped meeting up often, they stopped texting. Tay was now either alone, at work, or with his other friends. It's like he was stuck in a world where New didn't exist.

But he should have known. He had already seen the end before it even started. And a broken heart will always be what's left.

Loving someone like New, was a losing game.


End file.
